Common "Parental" Illnesses (a blog post for my wife)

Unbeknownst to many, there are some common maladies associated with parenthood.  Unfortunately, you must actually have young to teenage children living in the home in order to be struck down by these debilitating sicknesses.

I, for example, commonly suffer from mykidswon'tletmesleepitis.  The most recent bout was brought on last night when both the 4 & 7 year old woke up at 2:00 am to ask if they could watch cartoons.

While that particular disease doesn't strike down my wife with quite as much frequency, you may notice that her voice is constantly hoarse due to a little-known form of the influenza virus.  It's known as Ikeeprepeatingmyselfluenza.  One of the common side effects of this upper respiratory illness is the tendency to tell your kids to do something (or stop doing something) no fewer than 3 times within a 5 minute period. 

an acute case of "howinthehelldoIkeepmyhousecleananoma" if I ever saw one....

There is one other that both my wife and I suffer from on a regular basis; as do many parents.  This is the granddaddy of all parental illnesses known as howinthehelldoIkeepmyhousecleananoma.  Common side effects can include a hunched over posture from constantly picking up after the children, a strained look on the face from finding things improperly put away, dishpan hands, and a sensitivity to laundry detergent, dust, and Lysol from overuse and overexposure.

Today, I'll be calling my insurance company to see if any of these are covered under my plan.  Something tells me that I'll get hit with the pre-existing condition clause......