Random Things I Learned from a Decade of Living in Louisiana

• Baton Rouge on LSU game day.  Know what this means.  The capital of Louisiana can put a pro-game tailgate party to shame.

• Have you ever been out drinking on a Sunday afternoon in the middle of Ascencion Parish?  I have....and I'm black.  I live dangerously. One of the "bars" was literally someone's house. 

• "Lagniappe" - extra cool stuff that you don't necessarily need.  Getting a 52 inch TV is a necessity.  The $3000 home theater system to go with it is "lagniappe".

• "He needed killin" - a southerner's way of saying that this is our latest Darwin Award recipient.

• "down the bayou" - unless you know what's southeast of Napoleonville, LA, don't even pretend to know what "down the bayou" means.  Extra points for you if you know how to get to Bourg and Cocodrie.

• Gator tail is a delicacy.  Sorry, but if you're from Louisiana, you eat that, along with "mud bugs", and other critters.  These critters can even include swamp rat (Nutria).  I've actually seen "possum pie"; but it hissed at me.

• ...all you have to do is smell chitlins......once.  I have family members that eat that stuff.  Sorry, but I can only take things so far. Funny that I can clean the poo out of a bug and eat it (crawfish), but I draw the line at cleaning the poo out of pig guts, boiling them, adding hot sauce and consuming it.  

• Mudding is a professional sport there.  People actually ride around looking for opportunities to pull folks out.  I know 3 of them. 

• If you don't know where "the spillway" is, then folks will automatically know that you're not from there.

• Voodoo Fest is a heck of a lot more fun than Mardi Gras.  

• Know how to get to Pat O'Briens in the Quarter.  Know what time Dueling Pianos starts.  Know what drink to order while you're enjoying the show. 

• Forget Winn Dixie.  I know how to get to Rouse's and Early's.

• Mojo is real. Trust me on that.